If you decided to check out my “about” page you will find a little summary of why I decided to start this whole thing.
Back story (aka boring intro to a boring life)
I would like to say it started a week or two ago, but in reality it started about a year ago. I was in school for something I found would be a decent hobby. I was working at the same job I had for six years and counting. I found “love”, or at least a very good disguise of lust. Moved out. Yep, mom’s middle birdie decided to be the first to leave the nest, whether they liked it or not. I thought, just for second that I was on track.
Boy, oh boy was I wrong.
Long story short, after a long year of being pushed around, walked over, bullied, and told “No” over and over again I finally decided………”WTF”.
Why was I letting people treat me like i didn’t even exist in the world, like what i had to say didn’t matter or getting told my dreams were “unrealistic”. Does anyone know how that truly affects a person? Has anyone ever just sat down and cried because they don’t even recognize the person who’s looking in the mirror? Well that was me.
I am a diagnosed, dedicated, Insta creeper.
I can’t help it, I want to know what’s going on around me. What’s going on in the world.
All I kept seeing was these girls, all these girls posting about summer, spending days on a beach, on vacation, partying, drinking until sunrise and sleeping in all day just to do it again. These girls with all their new bathing suits, and name brand clothing, and booty pics and smiles on their faces that reach from one side of their cheek to the other.
I was jealous.
I am jealous.
Of girls and of people who I have never met. They had something i didn’t, they had the freedom that i wish i had. The freedom to do whatever they please, with who they please, when they want to do it. How lucky right?
So where do I go from here? Where do i begin this journey of freeing myself? Well the answer was literally right in front of me. Myself. I have to start with myself first.
So what does an emotional young adult do when they don’t know what to do? I looked it up. I Pinterest “Keys to happiness” and you know what I found, i found 10. Ten mystical, made up keys to happiness that a million people have probably tried and failed at, but here i am going to explain to you why i am not one of those people. Why I am going to better myself each day and make my future into something i look forward too and stop counting down the days until something happens and actually make something happen.
10 keys to happiness.
1. Rest your ego and the meaningless comparisons
2. Help others when you’re able
3. Spend time with those who inspire you
4. Let go of needless worries and old wounds (yes! let it go. let it all go! bye!!)
5. Choose to push forward even when it hurts
6. Be ambitious enough to fail
7. Turn your goals into daily habits
8. Focus on your authenticity and integrity
9. Be present in this moment
10. Foster your own personal growth
So there it is, as simple and as complicated as that.
I’m not here to bore you. Nor am I doing all of this for the attention or credit.
No, I’m here to exist, I’m here to show people who are in the hole, that it’s ok.
People who are in this metaphoric hole and can’t get out. The people who feel trapped in life, in relationships, in their own house, or in their own town etc.
Because here’s a little trick my mother always told me, the one thing she tells me whenever she knows I need to hear it. Some corny line from some movie she loves (I think its “We bought a Zoo” w/ hot older Matt Damon) but here it is:
“You know sometimes all you need is 20 seconds of insane courage. Just literally 20 seconds of embarrassing bravery. And I promise you, something great will come of it”
The one line, the one stinking line I will never forget.
Because the thing is, it works.